Thomas and the Magic Railroad (The Simpsons Crossover Movie)/Transcript/6

6/8 transcript pages of "Thomas and the Magic Railroad (The Simpsons Crossover Movie)".

Transcript
The scene cuts to Lily (as Lisa) touching the glass of a window. C. Junior (as Artie Ziff) reappears just on a skateboard.

Lily (as Lisa): Junior?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Presto! I'd given up on seeing you again. What's blue, green and red goes "beep beep"?

Lily (as Lisa): A parrot and you mean "chirp chirp".

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): No. Trains. Talking trains. (The skateboard jumps in his hands.) And I'm off to see them right now in the Island of Sodor, and cousin. But I overslept and I'm in a bit of a hurry. Do you want to come?

Lily (as Lisa): Be back by sunset?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): I hope so. And I'll be back at the beach! (kicks skateboard away)

Lily (as Lisa): What do you think, Mutt? (Mutt (as Santa's Little Helper) barks with a short sentence.) Okay.

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Good. It's this way. We'll take the shortcut. (bangs on the wall) And there's two of us. Oh, well. That means I'll have to use Cous' extra supply of gold dust. It doesn't matter. We'll have plenty more soon.

Lily (as Lisa): Can we take this a bit back by sunset?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Be my guest. I'll take care of it for you. Ready? Here it goes. [They teleport into a magic tunnel.]

Lily (as Lisa): You've grown bigger.

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Maybe you're smaller. I'm adjusting to my new surroundings. This is the only place this ever happens to me. A bit bouncy, isn't it?

Lily (as Lisa): Where are we?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Conductor's railroad!

Lily (as Lisa): Magic railroad?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Whatever. We're traveling miles and miles to the island. But, I don't know this railroad's gonna last much longer. It could vanish like the engine, and the engine needs to travel on that railroad, Cous and I never saw it. I don't know what happened to it. (sees that last coal truck that Thomas bumped) Hey, what's that doing here? Are you ready, Lily? Here are the buffers. [They teleport to the Magic Buffers and the Island of Sodor.]

Lily (as Lisa): Now where are we?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): In Sodor, of course. This way. [sees grass] Achoo! Oh, bogus. I think I'm allergic to grass.

Lily (as Lisa): I feel like climbing things.

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Stupid grass.

Lily (as Lisa): What's that noise?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): They're trains. They talk! We're just too far away to hear what they're saying.

Bertie: Good morning!

Thomas: (pulling Annie and Clarabel) Annie! Clarabel! There's Mr. Conductor! We've found him! (But it wasn't Mr. Conductor. It was Junior with Lily.) Oh, bongo! It's Junior!

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Thomas, don't look so surprised. I know you haven't seen me since…

Thomas: (interrupt's Junior speech) Hey, you stuffed party poppers down my funnel!

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Hey, we've had our laugh already.

Thomas: You did?

C. Junior (as Artie Ziff): Yes! First prize! Lily, I like you to meet Thomas. And where's my cousin? Come on, Lily. Mr. Conductor's at the windmill.

Thomas: Annie, Clarabel, I'll send Percy back to fetch you.

Annie and Clarabel: We've heard that one before!

Lily: (as Lisa) What's the matter?

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) Traveling sickness. Wait. Here comes my cousin!

Thomas: Mr. Conductor! Mr. Conductor! Thank throttles your safe!

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) Hey, Cous. What's up? Enjoying the sun?

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) No, Junior. I am not. As a matter of fact, I just landed here after escaping a heavy metal monster. Junior, where have you been?

Thomas: Is your sparkle back, Mr. Conductor?

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) No, Thomas. It isn't. But, I do know the clue. Stoke up the magic in the mountain…darn!

Thomas: Dither.

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) Cous, you're looking terrible! Now why don't we get more gold dust? I used yours up. Then I can go back to the beach by myself!

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Junior, I just want you to listen to me very carefully… (Mr. Conductor hasn't finished my sentence because a bellflower phone is ringing.)

Thomas: Uh-oh.

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) I'll get it. (reaches the bellflower phone) Hello? No, this is his cousin. Who's this? Oh, hello, Hattie. No. No, no, no. He's hanging around here somewhere. Mr. C., it's for you.

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Yes, Sir Topham Hatt, Sir! No, he just wanted to be friendly. No, he's not a dog. Let's say, he's a puppy and needed a good trainer. No, nothing to worry about it, sir. Goodbye, sir.

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) [pointing to Lily (as Lisa)] Cous, this is Lily, and stayed with Grampa Stone!

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Oh, really? Hello, Lily.

C. Junior approaches the windmill and rides on it.

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Junior? Junior? (sees Junior riding on a windmill)

Lily: (as Lisa) Junior?

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Junior, what are you doing up there? Come down! It's too windy!

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) This is just like the fun fair! Give us two seconds!

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Two seconds is all it takes for you to land in trouble! (The windmill spins faster and faster, and the wind blew C. Junior (as Artie Ziff) away.) Junior!!!

Diesel 10: (as C. Junior (as Artie Ziff) landed on his roof) Aha! Twinkle Toes Junior!

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) Oh no, my beach bag!

Diesel 10: You won't be doing any surfing up here, Mr. Kahuna.

C. Junior: (as Artie Ziff) Really? Watch me.

Diesel 10: Hang on tight, Moondoggy!

Thomas: Diesel's hijacked him!

Lily (as Lisa): What's gonna happen to Junior now?

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) My family's pretty good at getting themselves out of trouble. Eventually.

Thomas: I don't know what "eventually" means, but it sounds very, very long!

(Cuts to Muffle Mountain.)

Burnett (as Reverend): Where's Lily?

Bart: (as Patch) I wish she'd knew.

Burnett (as Reverend): I'm sorry. She wasn't at the station when I went back for her. It's okay, Patch. We'll find her. Don't worry.

(Cut to the Island of Sodor in darkness.)

Percy: (passing Diesel 10's mountain) I am brave. I am brave. Thomas says I'm brave. Oh, it's not easy being brave! Shivering pistons, there's Splatter and Dodge! And they even found the buffers. Oh, now what's going to happen? (The birds fly pass Percy. Then a tumbleweed passes Percy.) Oh, that's just nothing. No, wait. That nothing was something!

Splatter: Hey, that must be the buffers that Diesel 10 is looking for.

Dodge: Are we supposed to go through them?

Splatter: No. Not "we", "you".

Dodge: Not "me", "you. And this is another job for the boss! (hears a hooting owl) We'll tell him tomorrow.

Splatter: Yeah! Tomorrow's good!

Percy: (chuffs backwards away) Oh, I have to hurry back and warn Thomas!

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) I was doing my best to keep Lily cheerful. I knew she was worried about being late for her grandpa.

Lily: (as Lisa) How are we supposed to be back by sunset?

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Perhaps your grandpa can guess who you are. Because I think he's been here myself, long ago. And if he can help, I do wish he'd hurry.

Lily: (as Lisa) I haven't told Junior this, but soon he'll grow as weak as I am. Junior said there used to be an engine that traveled on the magic railroad. And if only we could find that, we could still head back to Shining Time.

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) Oh, that engine disappeared and was never heard or seen from again.

Lily: (as Lisa) I have to tell you something, Mr. C. I've heard a train whistle, and it sounded like it came from the mountain.

Mr. Conductor: (as Rainier) (comes up delighted upon the idea) Mountain. I remembered a part of the clue. "Stoke up the magic in the mountain and the Lady will smile"! But we need more information, Lily. And I know that your grandpa can help if he would just to believe he could.

Lily: (as Lisa) (quizzically) Lady?